The Morgue

Obituaries

CHERNARUS BUREAU · 3 months ago

Chernarus Introduced Itself to GreenHammer12 Nine Times Before Making It Stick

GreenHammer12 arrived on Chernarus with no history anywhere on record, and by the forty-seventh minute that distinction had been quietly retired.

GreenHammer12Survived 0h 47mKills 0Cause Infected

LIVONIA BUREAU · 3 months ago

LowerMarrow774 Outran Seventy-One Bites and a Fire, Then Bled Out Before the Hunter Could Collect

LowerMarrow774 spent ten hours and thirty-one minutes on Livonia proving nearly indestructible against the infected, then died of a wound that had nothing to do with any of them, with a living man closing in and nothing left to stop the bleeding.

LowerMarrow774Survived 10h 31mKills 0Cause Bled Out

LIVONIA BUREAU · 3 months ago

Angryas1anpanda Finally Beats His Own Clock, Loses to Someone Else's Rifle

Angryas1anpanda survived four hours and forty-five minutes on Livonia, which the file confirms is the longest he has ever managed across six documented attempts at staying alive, before Unforgivn420 closed the account with a LAR round fired from thirty meters.

Angryas1anpandaSurvived 4h 45mKills 0Cause Killed

CHERNARUS BUREAU · 3 months ago

ThatsMyStuff722's Debut Ends With Nothing Written in the Margin

ThatsMyStuff722 arrived on Chernarus with no file anywhere on the continent and, eleven hours and nine minutes later, left one that ends mid-sentence — forty-five scraps with the infected survived, the worst of them fourteen teeth deep, and then simply nothing.

ThatsMyStuff722Survived 11h 9mKills 0Cause Unknown

SAKHAL BUREAU · 3 months ago

LocallyHated506's Debut on Sakhal Runs Thirty-Four Minutes, No Sequel Filed

LocallyHated506 had no prior lives anywhere on record, arrived on Sakhal a total unknown, and closed the account personally after thirty-four minutes of work.

LocallyHated506Survived 0h 34mKills 0Cause Suicide

SAKHAL BUREAU · 3 months ago

Fourteen Minutes In, sLOppYfATtacos Beat the Infected and Then Beat Himself

sLOppYfATtacos stepped onto Sakhal with no record anywhere on the continent — no prior lives, no prior deaths, nothing — and left one behind within the quarter hour.

sLOppYfATtacosSurvived 0h 14mKills 0Cause Suicide

CHERNARUS BUREAU · 3 months ago

LostMisery8756 Survived Eight Ambushes, Lost to Simple Arithmetic

LostMisery8756 arrived on Chernarus with no history anywhere on the continent, spent one hour and five minutes proving he could take a beating, and then quietly failed to notice he was still taking one.

LostMisery8756Survived 1h 5mKills 0Cause Bled Out

LIVONIA BUREAU · 3 months ago

Angryas1anpanda Breaks His Own Record, Then Closes the Book Himself

Angryas1anpanda's fourth Livonia life ran fifty-two minutes, six longer than anything he had managed anywhere on the continent before it — and at the end, with something on his trail, he decided he would be the one to finish it.

Angryas1anpandaSurvived 0h 52mKills 0Cause Suicide

CHERNARUS BUREAU · 3 months ago

Angryas1anpanda's First Chernarus Life Ends Without a Sentence to Finish It

Angryas1anpanda arrived on Chernarus with no file anywhere on the continent and left one eleven minutes later that the paper cannot finish reading, because nothing wrote itself into it.

Angryas1anpandaSurvived 0h 11mKills 0Cause Unknown

LIVONIA BUREAU · 3 months ago

RonaldRaygun552's Third Livonia Life Lasted Nineteen Minutes, Explained by Nothing

RonaldRaygun552 came back to Livonia for a third go at a life this desk has now buried twice before, fought off the infected three separate times — the worst leaving eight marks and no clear victor — and then, nineteen minutes in, simply stopped appearing in the record, with no cause offered anywhere in the file.

RonaldRaygun552Survived 0h 19mKills 0Cause Unknown

LIVONIA BUREAU · 3 months ago

RonaldRaygun552 Outlasts Fourteen Infected, Still Hasn't Fired a Shot in Seven Lives

RonaldRaygun552's second Livonia life ran an hour and fifty-five minutes before YrJustBad closed the file from eighty-two meters with a Mosin, proving once again that the man can survive almost anything except another human being with a scope.

RonaldRaygun552Survived 1h 55mKills 0Cause Killed

LIVONIA BUREAU · 3 months ago

XxBE4zyxX Brings a Two-Life, Zero-Kill Record to Livonia, Infected Do the Math Anyway

XxBE4zyxX opened his Livonia file already sitting on two prior lives and not a single kill anywhere on the ledger, and needed three hours and thirty-four minutes across five sessions to file the same result under new geography.

XxBE4zyxXSurvived 3h 34mKills 0Cause Unknown

LIVONIA BUREAU · 3 months ago

YrJustBad's Eleventh Livonia Life Closes the Same Book, Same Way

YrJustBad lasted twelve minutes on an eleventh Livonia attempt, survived three separate quarrels with the infected — one of them an eight-hit affair that should have ended things right there — and then, with something closing in, ended it himself.

YrJustBadSurvived 0h 12mKills 0Cause Suicide

LIVONIA BUREAU · 3 months ago

YrJustBad's Sixth Livonia File Closes With the Cause Line Left Blank

YrJustBad went to Livonia for the sixth time, survived six separate disagreements with the infected — one of them a five-hit mauling — and then, fifty minutes in and in good health by every measurement the paper keeps, simply stopped being alive.

YrJustBadSurvived 0h 50mKills 0Cause Unknown

SAKHAL BUREAU · 3 months ago

Manega6319 Comes Back to Sakhal, Writes the Same Last Page

Manega6319's second file on Sakhal ran fourteen minutes, well short of the thirty-four he'd once managed elsewhere, and closed exactly the way his first one did: by his own hand.

Manega6319Survived 0h 14mKills 0Cause Suicide

SAKHAL BUREAU · 3 months ago

Manega6319's Only Life on Sakhal Ran Thirty-Four Minutes and Ended by Their Own Verdict

Manega6319 had no history anywhere before this — no prior lives, no prior deaths, a blank ledger — and closed it themselves after thirty-four minutes with someone closing in.

Manega6319Survived 0h 34mKills 0Cause Suicide

CHERNARUS BUREAU · 3 months ago

GabeFox101's Only Life on the Books Closes at Zero, Right on Schedule

GabeFox101 had no history anywhere on the continent when he arrived on Chernarus, and one hour and fifty-three minutes later the continent had all the history it needed.

GabeFox101Survived 1h 53mKills 0Cause Infected

CHERNARUS BUREAU · 3 months ago

CUPID18's First Recorded Heartbeat Lasted One Hour, Fifty-One Minutes, and Eighty-Seven Bites

CUPID18 arrived on Chernarus with no history anywhere on record and closed the file the same day, bled white by something with more teeth than manners.

CUPID18Survived 1h 51mKills 0Cause Unknown

LIVONIA BUREAU · 3 months ago

Angryas1anpanda Returns to His Best Map, Lasts a Third as Long as His Record

Angryas1anpanda's third Livonia file closed at fourteen minutes, killed by the infected after a single session that never had a chance to become a second one.

Angryas1anpandaSurvived 0h 14mKills 0Cause Infected

LIVONIA BUREAU · 3 months ago

Angryas1anpanda Outlasts Two Prior Selves, Then Fires the Author

Angryas1anpanda, whose career ledger showed two lives and a personal best of twenty-nine minutes, spent forty-six minutes on Livonia rewriting that number before closing the book personally.

Angryas1anpandaSurvived 0h 46mKills 0Cause Suicide